Im currently riding on a roller coaster. With all the ups and downs, last week was the happiest week but i supposed its going all the way down, down and down now..

it SUCKS.

i dun understand why its starting again. I've got a feeling that things arent gonna end, as in really putting a fullstop to it. Sighs. It ended a few times and also came back a few times. Y bother to make empty promises and makes everyone sad and disappointed again and again? Isit the so called "情绪" of life? I rather not have it. Its making everyone in the family going crazy and mad. Had the tap running for the whole nite the other day and i barely slept. Yet i still have to drag my super heavy feet and super tired eyes to work. Do u noe? I bet u dun. Was on the train today and thoughts came back. Wth.. i did the most embarrassing thing ever. Teared again on the train.. Everything looks fine when i got back, but it doesnt seem to be perfectly fine.. Afterall, gaps were all along there, needless to say now.

Many things were on my mind.. Sighs.. How about my sch fees? that was the first thing that came to my mind when he said he would no longer care about everything. He promised to pay for it and now? thats how sucky life is.. I wonder when a breakdown will take over me. I hoped it would not.. Thought of going for a walk today, but well.. no one was free and alot are having papers or enjoying themselves.. Went to the national library alone instead.. it was the grand opening today.. i thought alot, but life moves on i guess. I had to clear my mind by my own.. But i really dunno when that day would come..

*noe u all will have lots of qns for me after reading this entry.. but dun qn me k? i dunno how to explain things oso.. sighs. *

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

hee.. its my bday today..this year bday is not bad.. =P had quite a few celebrations this year.. first was with lena and gene they all, then was meeting up with milo and nisa, followed by F4, jiamin and my cousin.. ^-^ thanx gers! not forgetting all those who messaged me to wish me.. that includes... (the following might be quite a long list, haha.. ) jazz!(the earliest to wish me sia)milo,nisa, shwu huey, mamat(nisa's boy and he surprised me. -.-"), hanwen, wei sheng, jing ying, shimei, peimei, deborah(pm's fren) and a few online frens whom i have known for a few years..oh yah, eddy too! so touched! first time so many people wished me happy birthday.. lolx.. im so sua ku.. =X but juz quite happy.. and not forgetting the present that f4 , peimei and jiamin gave me.. i got the wallet shop vouchers and a voice recording pig from them respectively! and so touched that jiamin sang me a birthday song which was recorded in the piggy.. cute! thanx ger! f4 and pm bought me those vouchers for me to get a new wallet.. hee.. Thanx all of u for making my bday memorable.. =) took so many neoprints too. shall upload them when soon!

hmm.. updates? been sleeping very late for the past few nights.. rushed reports after reaching home fr meetings with u guys, but had no one to blame, only myself.. could have finished it off rather early but..i kept making changes to my report coz i dun like the way i phrase the sentences as well as the layout and everything.. -.-"

started work at ntuc as part time cashier already, ytd was the first time, there were many people so i couldnt really learn much stuff.. juz the basic things i need to noe.. the pay is only 4.65 bucks an hr.. but doesnt matter lahx.. probably will only work morning shift..

as for attachment.. my lo is finally coming to visit me! heheh.. wed he will be coming.. xiao yu very power sia.. ask me to write my own company assessment.. say write good things can already. coz he's lazy to write for me! (-_-") no comments rite? hahz.. anyway.. finally felt abit more useful at work.. was working with access to help them create a database to store all those who collected uniform.. their manual record is super messy.. and they asked if i have any solutions for them,so i juz told them abt access.. and was told to help them create.. yeapz..

ok la.. i think i better go sleep.. very tired.. take care peeps! i miss pei mei! hoho.. be sure to meet up real soon k!

Heya.. its been almost 3 weeks since my last entry.. hee.. top of the list, im lazy.. and my laptop is under repair.. so sad for me.. a week plus already. wonder when its gonna recover.. *i miss my lappieeee* spoilt at the wrong time.. sighs.. doing report is so tough.. have to fight for the time when my bro is not ard so that i can do.. :(

Hmm.. went out yesterday with lena and gene they all.. had a fun time.. thanx u guys.. =) it was to celebrate bang's belated bday and an advanced celebration for me.. really glad to know this group of friends and that we can stay in contact well. Had Yuki Yaki, the teppanyaki shop at cine.. they treated bang and me.. hee.. thanx thanx again.. din wanted them to.. coz i noe that all of us were like kinda broke.. but lena dun wan me to pay.. -.- ate so much that we were too full to walk.. and kel was so engrossed with his singing techniques( he attended a "singing class" by his friends before meeting us).. and lena and him kept singing Huang yida's song.. wad "那個女孩對我說" or sth lidat la.. quite nice i guess.. haha..

and made a decision to slim down.. haha.. went to see the doc recommended by shimei after knowing that candy made such a progress in slimming down.. stunning loh! from 70plus to 50plus.. 20kg.. woo.. thats so much.. but the doc says its in my genes coz my family members all big size.. so i have to work extra harder as compared to them.. *sob sob*shall try lahx.. i nvr noe until i try ma.. spent 80 bucks.. there goes my pay after paying everything.. and i shall now declare:
"I AM BROKE".
Went with shimei and her fren jia min ahx.. same name as my fren.. haha.. :X her friend oso slimmed down alot sia.. so good.. envy them loh.. then went for a meal with them b4 meeting lena..

Oh ya.. was scheduled for an interview yesterday one.. NTUC part time cashier.. the pay is not high.. but i tot just work first before i find another higher pay and everyone consents to it job. SIghs. nvm la.. but anyway.. din get to go for the interview coz qiumei told me her manager had a last min meeting at the headquarters..so i juz filled in the form.. anyway.. the job is recommended by qiumei.. one of my classmates during BE class and she lives near me.. she's been working there for 3 years already.. now i think is the assistant head for cashier or sth.. not very sure.. was toking to her last sat and she ask if i wanna work.. so i juz said ok loh..

Got in touch with eddy again.. haha.. so happy.. he's my sec sch classmate.. used to sit beside each other during class and he always teaches me maths.. ^-^ he's currently in melborune uni.. so good rite.. but life seems a paradize to him.. he has also put on weight! -.- haha..

Supposed to be doing report now.. but not in the mood.. how sia.. :( tmr will start eating the pills.. wonder how the effect will be like.. wish me luck ok? :)

shall stop here.. will try to update one.. haha.. :D

went k-songs with milo today.. quite alrite.. hope she is feeling better after drowning everything into the songs and singing them away.. =) anyway.. milo really loved to sing jay zhou's songs! haha.. sang lots of jay zhou songs.. hmm.. shall go next time with more pple okie? more fun.. kster is cheap. :X

went out with lena ytd.. walked here and there to acc her get her stuff.. then chatted abit.. glad that her prob is solved.. =D and she gave me a week to think of wad i wan for my bday?! its still so long b4 my bday.. =X seriously, i dunno wad i wan or wad i need. can u decide for me instead? hehe..

im really happy to noe jiamin! haha.. she asked me go eski bar on my bday? hee.. she noe im curious abt that place.. :P:P:P *touched* we shall see how okie.. and hope to meet u real soon.

and i think i really miss my frens alot.. how? whether its sec sch frens, working frens, poly frens.. all frens.. sighs. working is not fun. im like working with mothers. :X coz they are nice pple who always take care of me! ask me go for lunch and buy me fruits..! heehee

anyway.. im glad that im able to get back the long lost friendship with fred once again.. =)=)=) hee.. at least we are now friends.. maybe all thanx to his fren, sky! ^-^